To plant a new flower, we must first dig up the old dirt.
I think the remedy for a lot of things that people struggle with, is to find the root cause of the problem at hand. You see, when we shovel dirt out from the ground in order to plant a flower in a garden, we don’t point the shovel diagonal to the dirt-- we point it straight down and work from the bottom up. The same goes for our personal issues.
We must begin by analyzing the very foundation of our lives; the aspects that have been the basis for our actions, words, and thoughts. This idea is much like a tier: the first layer is our childhood, our background, our parents, our friends, etc. The second layer is our confidence or lack thereof, our insecurities, our anger or happiness, and so on. The third layer is who we are from society’s viewpoint as a result of these things. For example, because some people had a bad home life, they consequently deal with insecurities that shape them into a quiet or secluded person. Others are afraid to take risks after a tragedy occurred in their earlier years. Some people have deep-seated anger that is rooted in abuse from their youth. Certain individuals will have trust issues because their “friends” abandoned them when someone better came along.
Something must be clear here: who we all are as unique individuals is a stable reality. Our worth is not found in anything of ourselves and has nothing to do with us or what happens to us; we are wonderfully and fearfully made. However, I truly believe that there are tangible truths that we can break down in order to live more fulfilled, joyful, and peaceful lives.
I believe that the very child who grew up to have anger issues, can become a man that breaks the chain of abuse through forgiveness and constant self- discipline. I believe that he can become resilient, decide for himself that the cycle of wrath is not going to continue, and release both himself and those who have hurt him through this mercy that he demonstrates. I believe that the girl who lost friends in her youth and now struggles to be vulnerable and let people in, can become secure in her worth in the Lord and her friendship with Him alone. Afterall, the Bible promises: “Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” One day she will realize that there are billions of people in this world, so there are bound to be some that are better-suited for her interests, character growth, and for her soul. I believe in these things because I believe in hope. I believe that God is our ultimate counselor. I have seen time and time again answers within the pages of that Big Book of His when we have the discipline and yearning to open it. I have seen my friends get answers. I believe that He can make all things new-- no matter how bad those things seem. In fact, not only can He make them new, but He can make the struggle along the way have meaning.
My friend, I believe that bottom, up is the only way that the new flower is ever going to be effectively planted; if it has enough room to grow once the dirt is out of its way. What is your dirt?
Extra Scribbles to Consider: Within my job, I currently take care of a woman that is prone to getting frustrated and lashing out on a regular basis. However, she made a sarcastic comment out loud today pertaining to no one caring about her well-being. It was later on in the afternoon that I was able to help her into bed for a much-needed nap. She asked me if I could wake her up in about an hour so that she wouldn’t miss an event that the other residents at the assisted living center were participating in. Almost an hour goes by, and I swing by her room and remind her why I am waking her up. It is then that she gets the biggest smile on her face, leaving me pleasantly startled, and reaches out to take my hand in her own. I was instantly reminded of her comment that no one cared, and awakened to the realization that she just wanted someone to think of her, to remember to wake her up. She wanted to not be forgotten amidst her sickness, to not be confused or left out of the loop, to not feel lonely. She wanted to be normal and included. The root cause of her sarcastic comment was that she felt excluded, and that came out of her mouth in sarcasm because she was hurt. When we seek to understand the root of issues, we can not only work towards solving our own but towards being more empathetic to why people act the way they do. We all need a little help digging out those nasty roots sometimes.
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